Day 12

It's hard to believe that we are on the downhill stretch of week 2 here at the hospital. I understand now how days seem to just blend together when there is an extended stay. Seems like it's only been about a week. As of right now, we anticipate at least another week hanging out at SMH.

Maia had another sleepless night. She slept from about 12-1am and then from about 1:30-6am. So over the past two days, she's had maybe 8-9 hours sleep. Just will not let her guard down to fall asleep. Those beautiful eyes start to drift shut and she jerks herself awake and starts crying. It breaks my heart to hear her screaming and know that nothing I do will help and in some ways, even seems to make it worse. Don't know if any other adoptive parents have experienced this, but Maia will no longer make eye contact with Mark and I. This is another heartbreaking thing. I don't know what is going through her head, I worry about trust and faith in us and her perception that we aren't "protecting her." I wish that I could look into her eyes and comfort her. Mark and I both talk to her and try to explain things simply, but it's not the same. I was able to hold my sweet girl this morning and rock her for about 45 minutes. She did fall asleep in my arms and I am thankful for that. Wish that I had our recliner at home instead of the not so great rocker that is in Maia's room.

She started antibiotic #4 today. This is to treat the newest bacteria that has grown in her spinal fluid cultures. One difference is that this bacteria is the first one to actually grow in the culture from the ventricles of her brain. Maia will continue this until after surgery. It sounds like if things stay stable, the plan to replace her shunt remains for the middle of next week. A physical and occupational therapy consult has been requested, although I am sure they will not begin working with her until at least Tuesday since it is the holiday weekend.

We did get Maia out of her room and into a wagon for a short ride this evening. Although she didn't show much reaction, she did remain calm for the entire time so will plan to do this again tomorrow. It gives her a little change of scenery.

She continued to fight sleep this evening. Around 7pm, Maia had worked herself into a full blown screaming fit. The ICU resident wrote an order for some additional Ativan as needed which Maia received at about 7:30pm. Although she was quieter, she still would not give in to sleep. Her scheduled Oxycodone and Ativan were given and finally around 9:40pm, Maia fell asleep. I asked the nurse to cancel her scheduled midnight catheterization. If she wakes up, we'll do it but if she is sleeping - we are NOT going to interupt that! I think a decent night's sleep would do wonders for her.

I just want to say thank you to everyone for your ongoing prayers and encouragement. It's what keeps us going. I apologize that I have not responded to those of you who have emailed us directly. I do hope to accomplish that one of these days. Know that Mark and I read each one of your comments/emails. It is such a blessing to hear from you and feel your support!! On that note... I am going to try to get some sleep.

I will leave you with cute pictures. Matthew is spending the night and tomorrow with my parents. When they picked him up, they told him that he was going to have a surprise. Yes, it certainly was a surprise. Wish I could have seen the look on his face when he found out what it was! Suki is going to live with Grandmama and Grandpa Jerry, but she is Matthew's new puppy. He will learn to care for her and be able to play with her when he visits. I sure miss my boy!