We enjoyed Maia's first Saturday back home as a pretty lazy day. Somehow, the daily "routine" seems to take a lot longer and by the time that everyone else was ready and I got in the shower, it was after 11am. We went for a walk and Maia rode her trike while I pushed. She isn't pedaling at this point, but it does exercise her legs and the therapist feels that it keeps them familiar with the process of pedaling so that hopefully, one day she will pick it up on her own.
The kids had a nap this afternoon while I worked on some thank-you cards and Mark got a hair cut. Later, Matthew and Mark did some yard work while Maia and I enjoyed the cool inside the house. A friend from church brought over dinner which Maia loved! She ate a small bowl of spaghetti and little piece of brownie with some ice cream. I was impressed!
Poor kiddo has been quite cranky today. Not quite sure what's going on. I hope that it is just her being frustrated. I really struggle with the situation. There are so many "symptoms" that are listed as signs of shunt problems. Things that I really never gave a second thought to a couple of months ago because we just chalked them up to normal toddler behavior. Now, I question everything. I don't want to overreact, but I don't want to ignore a sign of trouble either. Maia's got a new scabbed area that appeared out of nowhere on one of her incision sites. She's irritable and has been sleepy. The mood and sleepiness can sure be attributed to adjusting to home, but it still makes me uneasy. Keeping a close eye on her.
Hoping to make it to church tomorrow morning. Honestly, this is going to be hard for me. Sounds weird, I'm sure. Going back to church is going to be wonderful! I have missed it greatly and look forward to worshiping with our church family. Since Maia's illness, I have found it very difficult to see people who know the "before" Maia. It is extremely emotional and I get quite tearful. Not sure why that is, it's not that I worry about people accepting her. Perhaps because they are a reference point for the "way things used to be."
I miss my girl. Yes, we still have her with us and I am thankful for that every day. But, I miss her smile, her voice, the words that no one else understood (but I did), I miss her hugs. I miss her reading her favorite bedtime story to Matthew and me, so many things. :-(
Hard to believe that tomorrow is my last day at home before going back to work on Monday. That's going to be a tough day. I've been with Maia almost constantly for the past seven weeks. I would not have wanted to be any place else. With both adoptions, I was always ok with going back to work. This time, it's different. Mark is a great dad and I have no concerns about leaving Maia (and Matthew) with him. But, it's not the same. I'm the mom. I've had this time to learn all those little ideosyncrasies that are new and different. My heart is going to be at home on Monday. Praying for God's strength.
That's about it for what's going on around here. I'll try to get some pictures posted tomorrow. Maia's hair is growing, soon it will be as long as it was when we brought her home. And Matthew has been so sweet with his sister. I am touched by his gentleness (most of the time) with her.
Would you pray for Matthew as well? He's having some discomfort tonight in spite of pain medication. Thanks in advance!!