Grief seems to be hitting me hard lately. My heart just aches for so many things. The beautiful children who lie in cribs in orphanages on the other side of the world without mommies to cuddle them and tell them how much they are loved. Some of my patients who are experiencing difficult health issues without an end in sight. Thinking of the recent loss of our beloved Grandma Hansen (even though I know she is in a much better place and I would never wish her back). And of course, the biggest part of me is affected with grief for our sweet Maia. Truth be told, now that we are "in the trenches" (for lack of a better term), my heart hurts for the losses she has sustained. I'm not trying to be negative or pessimistic. It's probably just that we are facing more of those "firsts" since she got sick. I'll probably blog more about that another time since I don't want this post to be any more of a downer than I've already made it.
As I said earlier, there is much to be thankful for and on that note, here's my list for today:
- Today was Maia's first day of school. I am thankful for the teachers, paras, and staff who are so committed to our warrior girl. Just as she thrived last year after starting school, I know she will thrive again this year. I wasn't able to be home when she left this morning, but daddy did take a couple of pictures.
- Speaking of school, tomorrow is Matthew's first day. I'm thankful that he will have the opportunity to make new friends and continue to develop new skills, as well as learn so much! Will share pics of his first day tomorrow.
- Hate to say it, but I'm thankful that tomorrow is Friday. You would think that I would be cruising into the weekend after my time off and a short work week. But instead, I'm looking forward to a laid back couple of days, hoping for some rejuvination.
- I am so very thankful for a Heavenly Father who loves me, who walks beside me always, who carries me when I can't walk, and who forgives my imperfections, my human-ness, and my sins. Thinking about His grace and mercy fill me with wonder and humility.