Act "as if?"

I often hear hear this phrase. It has come up several times during our adoption journey. We should act as if we have a child, act as if our adoption WILL happen - think and act positive. In fact, one individual indicated that this is really the key to success. That we should never consider the possibililty that it won't happen.

To be honest, I struggle with that. It feels arrogant to me to act "as if" our adoption is a given. Yes, my heart longs to have a child, to share the joys and challenges of parenting with the hubby that I love so much. Sometimes, when I watch young children with their parents, my eyes tear up and I wonder if we will ever have that experience. I trust that God has a plan for us. But, is it right to assume that God's plan involves Mark and I having a family of our own? That's where my other struggle comes in...

I know that God is faithful in all things. But, sometimes His plan for our lives is different than what our plan is. Proverbs 16:9 says, "In his heart, a man plans his course. But, the Lord determines his steps." Seven years ago, I had a pretty clear picture of where I thought my life was headed. Boy... was I WRONG! God had different plans for me - a life that was much different than anything I could possibly have imagined.  I want to be open to whatever God has in store for my life. I hope that includes adoption. I eagerly look for waiting children, hoping that God will say "Yes - this is your child (or these are your children)." But, I haven't heard that voice yet. Sometimes, I make inquiries about a child - only to hear God say, "No."  So then I wonder why I should act "as if." What if God has different plans for Mark and I? I am afraid that if I am too confident and positive about our plans, that I would be heartbroken if God said, "No - adoption is not in my plans for you - you heard me wrong." I want to believe that I am trying to be open to whatever God has in store for me instead of acting as if adoption is the only acceptable outcome. Or am I not trusting Him completely? I'm not sure.

I would love to hear your insight, opinions, and/or experience in this area - not just related to adoption, but life in general.