Some days, I get discouraged. I'll be honest, it's not always smiles, giggles, and laughter in our house. Raising a child who spent the first three years of her life in an institution has resulted in some behaviors and habits that are difficult to deal with. Sometimes, it's hard not to take them personally. There are times when I fail as a parent. And I fail miserably. Days when I'm not as patient as I would like to be. Days when I forget to ask God for guidance along this journey. Days that I wish I could "do over" again.
There are days when I fail as a wife, too. Days when I am cranky, short-tempered, not as loving as I would like to be. Days when I forget to ask God to help me be a better partner to Mark. Days that I wish I could "do over" again.
I know I will never be a perfect parent or a perfect spouse or a perfect friend or a perfect anything... I accept that and I try to do better. I ask for forgiveness - from God, from Mark, from Maia, from my friends.
Thankfully, there are other days. Days when I do get it right. When I slow down and take time for those extra hugs and kisses, those few extra moments spent together. I'm patient, tolerant. I manage to see past the behavior and recognize what's behind it. I look at the precious face of my daughter and thank God that He has trusted me to parent her (who am I to question HIS decision?)!
There are days when I remember to tell my sweet hubby how wonderful he is and how much I appreciate everything he does. Days when I just stop and enjoy the moments, treasure them for what they are. Days when I crawl into bed at night knowing that it's been a good day because of how I chose to live it.
Today is going to be one of those "other days."